Reproduction
by DragonSoul
Summary: A sex ed class turns rowdy when you get the FF8 cast involved!


Disclaimer: I don't own Grease 2, or Final Fantasy 8. I don't really want to own either of them...

Warnings: Humour, Language, Crude jokes

Notes: Written in real time for Xing-imouchan. It's pure insanity, so please ignore any OOCness.

Reproduction

by DragonSoul

Squall glanced out the window, then winced, narrowing his eyes against the bright sunlight streaming in. Blinded, he had no choice but to look back to Instructor Trepe, who was giving a lecture at the head of the class. A large paper chart was pulled down behind her, a cross section of a plant described clearly on the paper. A long wooden pointer in Quistis hand hit the chart periodically as she pointed out different areas of the diagram.  
  
"The parts of a flower are so constructed so that often, a gust of wind causes pollenation. If it doesn't, a bee or other nectar gathering creature can do the same thing. In fact, anything that gets the pollen to the pistels will suffice. From there, the pollen travels from the stamen to the stigma. This is called what?"  
  
Down in the front row, a young brunette transfer student from Trabia waved her hand wildly. "A photoperiodic reaction!"  
  
Nodding, Quistis smiled slightly. "Very good Selphie."  
  
"Hey, what page are we on?!"  
  
"Chapter six, page five Seifer."  
  
"Now, in an abstract way, the same applies to reproductive system of more complex life forms." Quistis reached up and yanked down another chart, this time one with a cross section of the male and female genitalia. Several cadets made faces, wincing. "Are there any questions before we continue?"  
  
Zell jumped to his feet. "Yeah, is it possible the female member of some sex on a couch could get this guy all hot and bothered and she never even knew it?" Seifer nodded, adding his two cents.  
  
"When the warm blooded mammal in tight little uniform starts pulling that stuff, it means that she wants to do it!" The blonde leered down at Selphie, who had been sitting in front of him."  
  
A snort answered them from the far side of the class where a lanky brunette leaned against the wall, two legs of his chair off the ground. "Can't prove that. They allllways change their tune when you got 'em in the back seat." He tipped up his low brimmed stetson, smirking. "They never want to finish what they start, even when they have you sweaty and panting."  
  
"You make it sound like a track meet! Gross!!" The special ed student, Rinoa, wrinkled her nose and flipped her hair.  
  
All the guys stood at this. "And all you girls can say is no, No, NO!"  
  
Sneering, the girls stood to confront their counter parts, voices low to imitate them. "Baby give it to me now!"  
  
Leering, the guys retaliated, raising their voices into falsetto. "Is that all you think about?!"  
  
Meanwhile, Instructor Trepe kept trying to teach. "The human being is the only creature able to conscious control their reproductive cycle. Any questions?"  
  
Sauntering down to Instructor Trepe, Seifer stared lavisciously down her shirt. "Yeah... Is it true that women like you, all mature and shit always carry a condom with them just in case?"  
  
"Hey, can't a girl just do that thing in a book where they count up the days of their, whatcha callit, mentalstrations?" Zell yelled over the clamour.  
  
"Oh that's real nice!" Sneering, Selphie placed a hand against his chest and pushed him down. "And what if the guy says the numbers don't add up right?" By now Rinoa had joined her, and they towered over the cringing Zell. "HUH?!"  
  
Grinning, Irvine shoved his hat under his duster and held it closed, appearing pregnant. When he spoke, his voice was a high falsetto. "I hope he's proud of what he's done!" Then his voice lowered as he removed his hat, planting it back on his head. "See what happens when a boy and girl don't play it safe?" The class roared with laughter.  
  
Quistis glared, then brought two fingers to her lips and whistyled peircingly. The class rushed to take their seats once more.  
  
Face stoic, Squall raised his hand. "Where does the pollen go?"  
  
~Fin~


End file.
